šļø Incompetence as a weapon
JAMBās colossal fuck up; Mandatory voting? In Nigeria?; The UKās new (razz) immigration rules
Hi!
I want to start this by sharing some That New News lore - did you know that the name of this newsletter was inspired by a song? The song is Dat New New by Kid Cudi. Loved the track when it came out, loved it when we started this newsletter 5ish years ago, love it now - enjoy!
This edition was written by Adetomiwa.
That New News is an independent, self-funded project by me (Adetomiwa). Thank you for reading, sharing and donating. I love you like I birthed you š
In this edition:
JAMBās colossal fuck up
Mandatory voting? In Nigeria?
The UKās new (razz) immigration rules
JAMBās colossal fuck up
In our last newsletter, we reported that an unusually high number of Nigerian secondary school students in Lagos who took the 2024/2025 Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examinations (UTME) failed. The exam, administered by the Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board (JAMB), recorded shockingly low scores across the country, even among typically high-performing students.
Turns out, the poor results werenāt due to poor performance. JAMB after everyone held their neck, admitted that the problem was a ātechnical errorā that affected over 300,000 students.
JAMB Registrar Is-haq Oloyede admitted that the board discovered āsignificant errorsā in the results of some candidates.
The board's eventual response came only after resounding pressure was particularly from students, parents and tutors.
On social media, students and teachers shared screenshots, academic records, and emotional testimonies questioning how top-of-class students could suddenly fail so drastically.
One tutor, Alex Onyia, who runs a private education service, helped amplify these complaints through his Twitter. His posts, along with student protests, appeared to push JAMB into action.
What went wrong?
According to Professor Oloyede, the glitch came from problems with how exam questions were shuffled and how results were uploaded. JAMB operates a regional management system that divides states into two main categories: the LAG vehicle and the KAD vehicle.
The LAG vehicle, which includes the South-west, South-east, along with Kano, Kogi, and Abuja, experienced errors in question shuffling during the mock exams.
Although JAMB claimed to have fixed the issue before the real exam, another technical breakdown occurred between Friday, 25 April and Monday, 28 April.
The issue, according to their recount, was that providers managing the LAG zone did not properly update some delivery servers, typical Nigerian nonchalance-driven incompetence.
This led to incomplete data and erroneous results for students who sat for the exam during that window.
In total, the glitch affected 157 centres: 65 in Lagos and 92 across the South-east (Abia, Enugu, Imo, Ebonyi, and Anambra). 379,997 candidates were impacted: 206,610 in Lagos and 173,387 in the South-east.
JAMBās fix
JAMB announced that all affected students would retake the exams starting Friday, May 16th.
By many accounts, even the rescheduled exams were problematic.
Onyia posted that students reported more system glitches, log-in errors, and unusually difficult questions. Some speculated that the tougher questions may have been intentional, that rather than resolve the issue fairly, JAMB could be trying to ensure that the retakersā scores are similar to their error mark.
Reactions
The fallout has been distressing for many families. In one heartbreaking case, a student named Faith Opesusi reportedly took her own life after JAMB gave her a low score.
While JAMB has publicly taken āfull responsibility,ā that does nothing for Faithās family or the thousands of others navigating emotional turmoil and uncertainty over their academic futures.
Online, the backlash has only intensified. Social media users are accusing JAMB of gross negligence, poor oversight, and bureaucratic incompetence. Many are calling for the resignation of top officials and demanding a complete overhaul of JAMBās tech systems and service providers.
Mandatory voting? In Nigeria?
A bill to amend the Electoral ActāÆ2022 and make voting compulsory for every eligible Nigerian has cleared its second reading in the House of Representatives - Punch
The billās sponsors, TajudeenāÆAbbas and Labour Party memberāÆDanielāÆAgo, say the compulsory voting technique will broaden participation, curb voteābuying (how?), and strengthen democratic legitimacy (yeah, forcing people to do things is first on the list of things that are considered democracy).
During Thursdayās debate, Ago told colleagues that many Nigerians stay home on election day, not because they lack interest in governance, but because the law allows abstention without consequence; mandating the ballot, he said, would reverse that trend.
In reality, many people stay at home because voting in Nigeria can be dangerous and life-threatening, and nobody enjoys knowing their votes probably wonāt count.
PDP representativeāÆMarkāÆEsset (AkwaāÆIbom) cautioned that forcing citizens to vote will mean little unless parallel reforms guarantee that those votes are counted transparently; otherwise, he argued, confidence in the system will remain low.
With the bill now headed to committee for clauseābyāclause scrutiny, legislators face the twin challenge of drafting enforcement mechanisms for compulsory voting while addressing deeper fears about electoral integrity and trust.
Nigeriaās cash transfer project
The World Bank says the Nigerian Federal Governmentās conditional cash transfer program has been a bit of a shit show (paraphrasing).
So far, only 37% of the targeted 15 million vulnerable households (approximately 5.6 million people) have received payments two years after the initiative was launched in 2023.
The program, backed by an $800 million World Bank loan, was introduced following major economic reforms, including fuel subsidy removal and forex unification, aimed at cushioning the impact on people.
Despite its intentions, the rollout has been slow and insufficient.
The World Bank estimates that rising inflation and sluggish economic growth have pushed over 40 million Nigerians into poverty since 2019, increasing the poverty rate to 46% of the population, and only 5.6 million of the 40 million are getting any government support.
A key obstacle, according to the FG, has been the requirement for biometric verification and a foundational digital identity for at least one adult in each household, which has delayed payments and limited reach. They emphasised the need for accuracy and transparency to prevent fraud and ensure funds reach the right people.
In response, the Federal Government has initiated a revalidation exercise of the National Social Register to verify identities and ensure accurate targeting of cash transfer beneficiaries.
As of May 2025, 2.3 million households have been revalidated and cleared for payment under the renewed scheme, according to the Director General of the National Identity Management Commission, Abisoye Coker-Odusote.
The UKās latest (razz) immigration rules
The UK government is doing everything to reduce immigration. Recently, they decided to implement strict new immigration reforms aimed at reducing net migration by tightening visa rules for lower-skilled workers, care workers, international students, and skilled migrants.
Home Secretary Yvette Cooper announced that care worker recruitment from overseas will be halted, requiring companies to either hire UK residents or extend existing visas of foreign workers already in the country.
The new rules are part of a broader plan to cut migration by up to 50,000 people in the coming year, following rising political pressure and public discontent over record-high net migration, which peaked at over 900,000 in 2023.
Skilled worker visa requirements will be raised to university degree level, and the list of job roles eligible for temporary shortage visas will be narrowed significantly.
International students will face tougher conditions, including a reduction of the post-study work visa from two years to 18 months, higher English language standards, and a possible levy on tuition income to fund UK skills development.
The care sector, which has heavily relied on migrants, is particularly affected. Employers must now show they tried to hire domestically before seeking workers abroad, and a āfair pay agreementā is being proposed to improve domestic recruitment.
Critics, including care home providers and opposition parties, have warned that the changes could worsen staffing shortages in critical sectors like healthcare and social care.
Many Nigerians, who have historically sought education and job opportunities in the UK, are now in a bind.
Around 25% of the NHS workforce is made up of Nigerian healthcare workers, further emphasising the UK's reliance on Nigerian talent in the healthcare sector, and people already complain about shortages in the NHS services.
Legal experts and immigration consultants say that the cost of relocating to the UK, especially through the student route, has skyrocketed to as high as N45 million, making the process far less accessible.
Some Nigerians criticised the UK for creating barriers after historically benefiting from us, while others have called on Nigerians to focus on building sustainable futures within their own country.
The Nigerian government has been looking for ways to keep Nigeria-trained healthcare providers in the country (everything but favourable working conditions), so while they have made no official comments, Iām sure they are happy about this development. Losers.